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March 30, 2017

What I Learned About Girls From Bringing Up Boys

I couldn’t help but think of the implications of this—and not just with children.

What I Learned About Girls From Bringing Up Boys

As the mother of a two-year-old and a seven-month-old, right now I’m diving into all the information I can get about raising my two little guys. I didn’t have any brothers growing up, and I have a challenging enough time trying to figure out my husband on a daily basis, so a few months ago, I turned to a book by Dr. James Dobson called Bringing Up Boys. As I was reading through, one passage practically jumped off the page and caught my attention:

“A recent study confirmed that girls are more fearful than boys. For example, they brake sooner when riding their bikes.”

Isn’t that interesting? Girls brake sooner than boys. Girls tend to be a little bit more nervous and cautious. Dr. Dobson goes on:

“They react more negatively to pain, and try not to make the same mistake twice. Boys, on the other hand, are slower to learn from calamities (Christy note: Those of you with boys, can I get an ‘Amen’?!) They tend to think that their injuries are caused by ‘bad luck.’ Maybe they’ll have better luck next time.”

Y’all, I couldn’t help but think of the implications of this—and not just with children. If you have kids, you know boys and girls are so different! But men and women are different, too. We have unique challenges and also unique opportunities in business. God has created and wired us that way.

We’re incredibly relational, we go above and beyond with customer service, we’re exceptional at details, and we’re amazingly perceptive and intuitive. We have all these strengths that we bring to business that are very distinctive to us!

But we also have challenges. Think about the boys’ and girls’ bike study, and how that concept follows us into adulthood. We are less risky than men—which may explain why car insurance rates are higher for men than women, right? We brake quicker than men do, even when it comes to business.

We’re a little bit more scared of risk.

When we make a mistake, we don’t want to make that same mistake again.

If you’ve followed me for any length of time, you may have heard me talk about or read my blog about the speaking event that still haunts me to this day. I absolutely bombed. I drove home from that event bawling my eyes out. You know what I told myself on that drive home?

“Never again.”

I didn’t want to put myself out there ever again. I didn’t ever want to feel that pain, failure, hurt, embarrassment and rejection ever again.

Related: The Truth About The Lies Fear Tells You

But if I would have given up that day, I never would have experienced the progress I feel today. Business Boutique wouldn’t be a thing, and thousands of women and business owners would have gone unserved. It’s our nature as women to avoid (like the plague!) making the same mistake twice.

We are called for more, friends. You’re going to make mistakes. I’m going to make mistakes. We’re going to have setbacks. There will be people who reject your ideas, your products, and your services. There will be people who straight up don’t like you! I know that it hurts, and I know that people can be mean.

But don’t let that stop you from doing what God’s called you to do.

Because even though we might be a little bit more scared than men are sometimes, if we want to succeed in business, we have to be willing to fail. We have to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, get back on the horse, and do the thing again anyway.


If you’ve had an idea in your head or a dream on your heart that you’ve been waiting to act on, what is holding you back? Often those whispers of doubt and feelings of fear are enough to keep you from doing big things. But what if it’s actually wisdom? It’s sometimes hard to sort through the emotions and tell the difference. That’s why I created a Fear or Wisdom Filter, to help you get to the root of those feelings so that you can decipher between the two! Is it fear or wisdom? Find out below!

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  • Temple M BoClair says:

    All I can say is that you are spot on & hit this post right out of the ballpark for me! I pre-ordered “Business Boutique: A Woman’s Guide for Making Money Doing What She Loves” in February & I am so excited to read it!

    I thank you so much for sharing and for your inspiration & encouragement.

    Best to you on your 1st new book & Godspeed to you always,
    Temple M. BoClair
    Christy Wright Tribe Member

  • Carter says:

    Christy – AMEN! To all of this. As a mom of two boys myself, not only is there a general lack of braking in our house, but I see the parallels for this in almost every area of life. Watching our 3 year old play soccer, the girls approach the game in an entirely different way. And at work, men and women approach tasks and conversations that parallels this in many ways. This was also completely true of my brother and I as we were growing up. And the list could go on and on – some stories funny and others not so much. Thanks for your hard work in making it not only possible but so ok to be a woman and follow your dreams. 🙂